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franklin county times

Absurd comments make me crack a smile

I often try to find the humor in things because life is usually easier if you can have a good chuckle along the way.

Some events are so horrific there is no humor to be found, but many situations are begging to be made fun of. Monday, within the span of 30 minutes, I heard two things that made me stop, consider the absurdity of the situation then laugh.

The first situation was while I was driving to an interview and I heard a commercial on the radio for Heritage for the Blind. Now I do not find humor in the loss of vision, but I do find it odd this organization was asking people to donate cars.

There was no explanation as to how the donated cars would benefit the blind, so the listener could draw only one logical conclusion — the cars are for the blind people.

I’m sure Heritage for the Blind is a fine charity — I have done no research on the organization to verify that statement, however — but it seems odd it wants cars.

Is Heritage for the Blind in collusion with the people who put Braille on the buttons of the drive-thru ATMs?

Surprisingly the commercial was not the incident that caught my attention the most.

While searching for an apartment, a friend of mine inquired about the pet policy. He was told that he could have pets if they did not exceed 20 pounds and the pets were not vicious breeds.

This makes sense at first but further examination reveals the silliness of this policy. Think of all the dog breeds that weigh less than 20 pounds. Now think of how many of those breeds have a reputation for being vicious.

I have never seen anybody running for his or her life because a Bichon Frise was chasing that individual.

I know of a few small dogs that think they are vicious, but in reality couldn’t hurt air.

My sister is the proud owner of a Dachshund named Bunny. Bunny thinks she is as big and bad as the meanest Rottweiler, but when you turn and growl back she tucks her tail and backs away.

Can small dogs be vicious when they have breed names such as Silky Terrier, Dandie Dinmont Terrier, Dorkie, or — my personal favorite for absurdity — YorkiePoo?

I also subscribe to the theory that if a dog can fit in a purse, by nature, it can’t be vicious.

Sorry, I’m not trying to be sexist or anything, I’m only saying dogs that small are more like glorified rats than real dogs. As such I will only be terrified of them if they are carrying the black plague.

It might not be the most popular viewpoint, but it makes more sense than donating cars to blind people.

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